Monday, December 28, 2009

here we go

stuffed garbage bags and empty boxes,
memories tossed curbside,
ribbons and receipts,
socks and books,
gifts from loved ones,
an old year dying quietly,
but yet,
what is this vapid emptiness that lurks behind every happy moment?
what is this sinister shadow that creeps behind every new hope?
things have not changed,
the same fear,
the same dread,
stirring my anxious bowels,
the chemicals shift quickly in my brain,
like strange voices echoing in a dream,
tossing and turning,
medicating, escaping, running...
but yet,
where's my true will?
an empty resolution?
a pep talk?
a happy thought?

...more a resolve,
an anger,
an energy,
beyond ego,
a meta-physical strength this,
to know things,
then to let them go,
awareness remains steady,
with the body shaking,
I jump into the unknown.


Capital A. said...

Dox, you been on a hot streak. Just when I thought the new year would bring with it a fresh decade of personal happiness and contenment, you jolted me back to my usual senses. That is, life sucks a big fat, droopy t*t. And it always will. No point in deluding oneself otherwise. If I can say something to the blogosphere: Accept the futility of the human experience. Know the despair of where we live: in the a$$ pore of the universe. Then you'll be able to hold your head high; that is unless you didn't bust open your calcium deficient skull falling down drunk on a concrete curb, your new shoes stained with green bilious reguratated vomit from an inflamed stomach of intestinal acid and past the due date soft cheese. If I can say something else to the blogosphere: Read the Human Paradox. It'll set you straight, like a poke to the eye and knee to the n*ts. All with the artistry of a Bukowski poem.

Happy New Year!!!
P.S. No news on 'Fish Eye's' Blog.

Square Corner said...

Err, Capital A is me, the Square Corner. Just in case you were wondering.